Saturday, February 03, 2007

"Monk" and domestic violence

In today's episode of Monk :

Captain Stottlemeyer is provoked into violence by a man who claims to be having an affair with the captain's wife (the provocation is intended to contaminate a crime scene and allow him get away with murder). Captain Stottlemeyer is required to go to anger management classes as a result. He is told to say 'these things happen' when he gets angry to stop him doing anything else and that anger is only a feeling and as an adult he doesn't have to act on that feeling. This is only from a story, but is exactly the kind of advice you would get at an anger management session.

What about women who get mad at their husbands for having affairs, or just for wanting a divorce and respond by cutting up the husbands clothes, or vandalising his car, etc.....? "anger is only a feeling and as an adult she doesn't have to act on that feeling".

Or women who kill their sleeping husbands because they are afraid of them? "fear is only a feeling and as an adult she doesn't have to act on that feeling". If you are in fear of your husband you have options, you don't have to kill him. Particularly not when he is sleeping - a perfect time to leave. Men have very few options if they want to leave an abusive wife. There are approximately 478 shelters for battered wives in the UK (1). There are only 2 domestic violence shelters that will accept men. Only 1 is solely for men and their children.

The most extreme statistics regarding proportion of victims of domestic violence in the UK come from counts of reported crime. They indicate that men are victims in about 15% of reported domestic violence crimes(2). But shelters that accept men account for only 0.4% of the total. The yearly rate for domestic violence is 4.2% for men and 4.2% women (British Crime Survey 1996, reported in HORS 191).

Women's Aid run most of the domestic violence shelters in the UK. They do now admit that at least some men are victims of domestic violence, but none of their centres will admit men. Most will not even admit women with sons over the age of 14. The only shelters that do admit men are run by The Mankind Initiative (see my links) which is not mentioned at all on the Women's Aid website.

More statistics on domestic violence can be found HERE. The reality is more complicated than feminist organisations like Women's Aid would have you believe.

(1) Women's aid:

(2) Women's aid:


FredXblog said...

Great post Phantom !!

I also saw that episode of Monk- and I am sure that there were only men in that Anger Management class

Implied gender bias perhaps

Yep- I reckon so

In regards to DV in general- men have never been helped

The government do not recognise- and nor do they even want to- that men can be victims too

Gender politics and inside corruption have seen to that

The best thing we can do is keep shouting about this in the hope that more men will become aware- and in turn act- thus putting pressure on the government to change its ways

But that's some way away yet, unfortunately

Oh well- we can't give up, that's the most important thing here

Masculist Man said...

Check out my blog.

Michael Reed said...

There is a petition on subject of equal provision of facilities for all battered persons here:

Masculist Man said...


I've started a Men's Rights Blog and if you provide a link to it on your blog page I'll receipocate.

callum said...

Especially on your domestic violence point. Men actually constitute more than half of the victims of spousal abuse, yet the law presumes men are guilty even though most violent relationships are mutual. (

You may find that useful if you ever need statistics for your blog. It has over 200 studies on it.

amused onlooker said...

Interesting story from the Sun that backs up your post:

Winehouse: Whack to Black

"The Back To Black singer
admitted she has a violent
streak that comes out when she
drinks — and she often uses
new hubby Blake Fielder-Civil
as a punch bag.


“I’ll beat up Blake when
I’m drunk. I don’t think I’ve
ever bruised him, but I do
have my way. If he says one
thing I don’t like then I’ll
chin him."

Another fine role model for todays "strong & empowered" young "ladies".

Punk said...

How many men get killed in their sleep by a female partner?

Rob said...

I have an antifeminist blog called "Antifeminist Models" at

Andromeda said...

Should men question chauvinistic feminism that allows women to simultaneously claim to be (1) equal to men (2) superior to men AND (3) the weaker sex in need of greater protection?

Anonymous said...

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Mark Vanburgen said...

I have found a feminist attack video on another blog. It seems to have been created by the third wave foundation and calls all men RAPISTS. I think this is terrible and must be stopped. check out the link here.

Michael Reed said...

So, what happened to the blog? Were you offed by a feminist hitwoman?

Coffee Catholic said...

Anger management classes are stupid!

Ok, that statement sounds rather stupid too but I'm exhausted and cant come up with anything that sounds a bit more catchy...

Seriously, anger management classes are yet another symptom of our sissified, castrated post-Women's Revolt society. Gaaaah... anger is good. It's healthy. It's what gets things done! Sure, *some* angry people go and do bad things like murder but not *all* anger needs to be divorced from humanity. These damn limp-wristed ninny-pants Liberals and Feminists just can't handle NORMAL, can they? Gotta freakin' sissify everything. Gaaaah...

Well, Liberalism/Feminism (one and the same?) is stupid so why am I not surprised that stupid things like anger management classes exist?

I'm babbling. GOD I wish I could take a nap but this newborn wakes up as soon as I try and lie down...